Heddir
One thing is true about happiness: there are
very few new truths out there. The greatest
minds in history have turned their attention to
the subject, so while it’s often challenging to put
that wisdom into actual practice, it’s pretty
clear what kinds of actions are likely to yield a
happier life.
Likewise, “tips lists” have been around for a
long time. I get a big kick out of uncovering tips
lists from the past: Sydney Smith’s tips for
cheering yourself up from 1820, Francis Bacon’s
tips for how to be happy from 1625, Lord
Chesterfield’s tips for pleasing in society from
1774.
In De Civilitate Morum Puerilium Libellus: A
Handbook on Good Manners for Children,
Erasmus gave seven tips about how to behave
yourself around other people. He wrote this list
around 1500 A.D., and his advice has a long
shelf life.
According to Erasmus, you should not…
1. gossip
2. tell unkind stories
3. boast
4. indulge in self-display
5. seek to defeat others in argument
6. interrupt people when they tell a story
7. be too inquisitive
What would you add to your own list? For
myself, I need to add:
8. don’t “top” (meaning, don’t say things like,
“Wow, you think that was bad, wait until you
hear what happened to me”)
9. don’t keep bringing the conversation around
to your favorite topics if other people don’t
seem as obsessively interested in them as you
are.